December 30, 2010

Going to be riding in no time...

Ha! What a big lie! So yesterday I went to my foot appointment with Dr. K. All the way down I was doing my singing of "Partial weight bearing OHHH YEAH!", it was pretty hilarious and I was super excited.

I got to the office and went in and talked with S, the secretary. She is so awesome and always bubbly and I always enjoy talking to her. It wasn't long before I was in the waiting room.

Dr. K took off my dressings and I was so suprised! NO SWELLING, like at all. The incesion was a blackish color but I'm sure thats just dried up blood. Dr. K got talking and she wanted to take the screw out 6 months from now, and this is the only time I ever said "No" to Dr. K. I told her that it would have to be the summer after because I have big plans this summer, like working at a rescue, and I can't do it on cructhes and that I sacrificed my winter for this surgery, I'm not sacrificing my summer also. Dr K looked at me and was kind of shaken, I have NEVER been that, I won't say nasty because I wasn't, but for lack of a better word, nasty to her. She said that I would be up in no time and only be on crutches for a day or so. This I was more okay with.

Next she took an x-ray of my foot, this is where I would tell if I would be partial weight bearing. The x-ray was developed and she got talking and said I could now get my foot wet, which I was happy about, and thought that meant I could be walking that day...but then she said "I'll see you in 2-3 weeks, but stay no weight bearing until then" I went silent and my mom looked at me, knowing that wasn't the answer I wanted to hear. The whole point of having my surgery during the winter was so that I wouldn't have to be on crutches during school, I HATE IT, but my next appointment is the Friday after school starts, which makes this whole surgery seem like a waste of time, which it wasn't but it feels that way.

The whole hour and a half drive home I was silent and just staring out the window on the brink of tears. I finished my "The Power to Win" book, which made my mood even more depressing. It's going to be so long until I can be riding again.

Stupid feet.

December 27, 2010

Snow snow snow

You've always heard of "Be careful for what you wish for" right? Well today is my day, we have gotten at least a foot of snow and it's not suppose to stop snowing until 2AM tomorrow morning. I love snow, but this is just over whelming, since I'm obviously of no help because of my foot. My mom got stuck in the drive way and my Grandfather and my older sister and her boyfriend hopped right up to go and help and I was like "umm yeah I'll stay here" it really sucks.

BUT, I do have some good news. This Wednesday, the 29th, I am going for my doctors appointment and I am hoping that she will say that I can start with partial weight bearing! I am going to be back riding in no time. I have set a list of goals that I wish to accomplish that I am going to talk to M. about when I go back to riding.

1. Get back into the "swing" of things
2. Ride at least once a week
3. Talk to M. about cantering and ask what I can do to prepare.
4. Set up a training "sheet" to go by to make sure I stay on track.

Also I hope everyone had great holiday, I know I certainly did. The whole family was together and we had our traditional Christmas breakfast of french toast and sausage and bacon.

I have to say one of my best gifts was a book that my Grandmother bought me! The Power to Win: Achieving Peak Performance with Hypnosis and NLP I have read close to 100 pages and even though there are some pages that were dry, its very interesting and I can't wait to start trying some of it out.

Thanks for reading everyone :)

December 24, 2010

Happy Holidays!

First off, before I forget, I want to wish everyone Happy Holidays and to being safe and with your family. Personally I am super excited for tomorrow because the family tradition is that my grandparents come over to open presents and then we have a french toast breakfast! This year will be special because my older sister's boyfriend will be joining us. My older sister moved in with her boyfriend and now live about an hour away, so my mom and I picked them up this morning and they are going to spend the night and spend Christmas morning with us.

I know the Holidays are suppose to be filled with joy and family, and I have all of that and so much more, but I can never help but think about the vetrans overseas fighting every day, and not getting a chance to see their families on Christmas morning, and watch their kids ripping open gifts and seeing those smiles of utter surpirse on their faces. This year I heard a very touching song, it has been around for years but I guess this is the first year that I actually listen to the lyrics, and it touched me immensely. The song is called Camouflage and Christmas Lights I realize everyone is super busy with the holidays, and I am in no way a very religious person, but it would be nice if you could just take a moment to send a prayer to those who don't get a chance to see their families this holiday season, pray for them to come home soon and safely.

Now, horse news! I went to the horse barn yesterday and decorated Ranger's stall!

Ranger's door. He has, red tinsel with green balls, two little stockings, green bow, and a reindeer.

Ranger's "window", silver beads with bells, and a snowman headband.

See, the way I am, I am a worry wart when it comes to horses, ask my friends Erin and Kirstin they will tell you! So, to make sure that Ranger didn't think the tinsel and beads were snacks for him, I hung them up as high as I could get while safely one footed on a mounting block, yes talent, and then I used bailing twine, AND resourceful, to tie all loose ends to in front of some wood, so the best he could do is chew on the bailing twine. Ranger isn't known for being chewy on inanimate objects, but I just wanted to make sure.

As time goes on I'm missing riding more and more, but I'm going to drive M. nuts with me asking if I can ride as much as I can! I'll be riding soon enough, just time and patience.

Happy Holidays everyone and be safe!

Thanks for reading.

December 20, 2010

Blast From the Past

Today was a very enjoyable day. My Grandparents had to go down to Rockland (which is by the coast) to attend a 1 hour seminar about, well not sure exactly what they are called but "time shares" comes close to what it was about. We went to Rockland and met with this very annoying guy but I guess all sales men have to be.

But it wasn't that part that made my day super enjoyable...

After that we went to go see my Grandmother's sister, who I call Aunt Dot. My Grandmother has 11 brothers and sisters and I have heard many stories and in fact did a whole biography on my Grandmother's life for a history class and I have often found myself wishing I grew up being one of my Grandmother's sisters. I believe that time era was a great time to live, even though people were poor and you had to work for every cent you made, but that is the part that I enjoy so much.

After what seemed FOREVER with the sales man we finally got to Aunt Dot's house and my Aunt Shannon was there. Aunt Shannon is my Grandmother's niece. We all sat down and started talking and the main topic was stories of the past and how my Grandmother and her family was like when she was growing up, its always very interesting to listen to this.

Next we went to Aunt Madaline's house, another sister of my Grandmother's. Aunt Madaline is the oldest child of them all. We visited her and, again, talked about the past.

I must be crazy wishing I grew up with my Grandmother but it's true! This blast from the past today was very refreshing from my normal routine.

Tomorrow I'm going to watch Maggie riding so I will be able to see Ranger again!

Thanks for reading.

December 19, 2010

Time to be proactive.

I feel that I owe my readers a little explanation for my past very depressing posts.

This, what I call a "depression phase", happens every time I have had surgery on my feet. I go a day or two and can't stop boo-hooing about how awful I feel and how much life sucks, and I usually find something to get my mind busy and it goes away.

Last night I found a way to do that. One of my worries about this surgery was that I was going to get out of my riding shape that took me so long to develop. I am limited to what I can do but I decided to be proactive. I looked up online for some exercises that I could still do on crutches and came up with two that I am going to do daily. One is good old sit ups. I did 30 very slow sit-ups last night and couldn't do anymore. I wasn't sure weather to feel proud or sad haha. Next I did ten reps of leg lifts, keeping each leg in the air for 5 seconds. My right foot (the one I had my operation on) had my ice boot on, so that added maybe around 3 pounds, which in my mind is a bonus.

I did those exercises and felt immediately better. I also went to the alpaca farm today and Max is doing great! His hind end is still curved in, but I have seen him out in the pastures a few times and even saw him run a yard or so. I went up to Max who was eating grain and gave him my usual "maxy-max!" greeting and he looked up and gave me kisses and nibbled on my nose, a more recent greeting of his, and my heart just warmed right up.

Next we finished up our Christmas shopping and my Grandmother bought me two books in a series about a vet. I was tempted to buy a book about horse bits and equine veterinarians but I decided to wait until after Christmas.

So my wish list so far for AFTER Christmas?
1. Some horse books
2. Some vet books
3. Point and Shoot camera

Thanks for reading!

December 18, 2010

What bond?

I got to see Ranger today. I asked my sister Tia when she got home if she could bring me to the barn to see Ranger. At first she said no, which honestly, ticked me off. I was so mad. She called back saying she would take me so I got super excited and called M (barn owner) just to make sure that we could go. She was in the barn but her Mom said she didn't see why we couldn't.

Driving to the barn was SO SLOW it seemed 10 times longer than it would usually take. We finally got to the barn and I jumped out and had to remind myself to go slow on the icy drive way.

Into the barn I went and haven't I missed that smell! The first comment I got when I went into the barn was "HEY CRIP!" go figure huh! We talked a little bit and Tia said "Are you ever going to see your man?!" So I went and turned on the lights.

I was already for one of those experiences I keep reading on the other blogs I read about.

My foolish expectation was that Ranger would look up when I said his name, perk his ears, sniff my hand, and I'd open the door and he'd walk right over and let me pat him all over...

Well from past experiences I know that expectations only lead you to getting hurt.

Here is what really happened:

I walked up to Ranger's stall and he was quietly munching on his dinner hay. I was 3 feet away from his door and said his name, he didn't look up, got to his door and said his name again, he still didn't look up, I walked over to his viewing window and said his name again and he finally looked up. His ears were perked, I stuck my hand through the bars and he sniffed it....and then went back to eating his hay as if I've been there every day. My heart sadly to say dropped. I couldn't get him to bring his head back up again.

It was only Tia and I in the barn so I opened his door and was going to slowly walk up to him and pat him. Yeah I was on crutches but he saw me come in looked at me and went back to eating and I was going to go super slow...but then Tia told me that M said I couldn't go in his stall... because I was on crutches.

Let me tell you I was more sad when I left than I was yesterday. I started questioning this "bond" everyone thought that him and I had. Geeze I didn't even get to pat him...

I hate these crutches, I hate my feet, I hate these surgeries, but the worst part is that no matter how loudly I scream how much I hate the situation I am in, nothing is going to change it.

Despite what I may write about...I wouldn't change my life for anything. I have the best family in the world and everything I could possibly ask for, its just...:sigh: this sucks.

Little more chipper.

So unlike yesterday, I am in a decent mood today.

I woke up at first today thinking "Oh great another boring day as Gimpy", almost forgetting about what I was going to do today.

No I'm not going to see Ranger, well maybe tonight, but no I am going to see my Grandfather's Aunt! She is 92 years old and living in a nursing home because she has Alzheimer. Her home is having a Chirstmas party that I was invited too and I jumped at the opportunity to get out of the house.

It makes me laugh because since my surgery, 8 days ago, I have yet to wear anything but sweat pants and PJs because well, thats the only thing that fits comfortably over my walking cast. Thinking about this brought back a memory of my Aunt L. I was visiting her at the other home she was at and she has a room mate who was more deaf than a wall, it was cute in a way. Well her room mate would always go to breakfast in her night gown and one day while I was visiting, the lady came back and my Aunt L. freaked out on her. She was saying "How can you go out looking like that? In your night gown?? Your suppose to get dressed!" My Aunt L. grew up being very particular and lady like so going out in a night gown NEVER happened. Well this lady goes "What?" and my Aunt L. says "Put your hearing aids in you old bat!"

Now set aside your first impressions of this lady, she is usually really sweet and nice! I had never seen this side of her before, and I was almost afraid that my Aunt L would start throwing punches. It was very funny!

Well I'm off to the Christmas party, and more than likely explain 100 times what happened to my foot. I'm thinking about coming up with another story saying I fell down stairs instead of saying I had surgery and why blah blah blah. It gets old after a while. Either that or I'm going to print off 1000 typed pages of what happened and just pass them out as people ask me.

Thanks for reading!

December 17, 2010

Just because I can...

Just because I can, I am going to post a SECOND post in the same day.

I ended up being super bored, whats new right?, so I started reading some horse blogs that I'm following and Freaking A I should know better! Wish I could say thats the end of my rant but its far from it!

I miss the barn! I stopped working there because
A. School was getting busy
B. My work was starting to get super busy

It seemed that as soon as I quit my barn job everything quited down. I know it was something I had to do but I've regretted doing it ever since! I miss having the horses listen to all my complaints and rants and problems and just listening quietly and twitching their ears which made it seem like they are listening.

I miss the being able to ride all the time. I was able to ride because I was already THERE and now when I ask, well before my surgery, my mom if I can go ride it was always a groan and it felt like my old boss didn't seem as eager as she use to be to let me ride, but that could just be my perception.

Then I start reading blogs and start wishing how I could be riding and how I could at least CANTER while so many people are off doing cross country, endurance, and eventing shows <.< I'm not saying they shouldn't that is GREAT for them, its just on the outside looking in I guess.

I miss Ranger a TON :( I was looking through some photos on my camera and I found two pictures of Ranger that I failed to upload to Facebook. Ranger, is my main theme haha. Can't believe how attached I am to that horse its ridiculous. What happens when he moves back home to New Hampshire, what happens when I go to Minnesota for college?

I might have an opertunity to work for a Mustang Rescue in Maine this summer. I am still talking to the owner and want to plan a visit, oh and still have to talk to my mom. I won't get riding lessons, but I'm going to be able to learn how to train a horse, and learn the aspects of running a rescue, on top of mucking stalls! Love doing the down right and dirty work, because well, I'm weird like that!

Okay sorry for the ranting but thanks for reading!

Enjoying Winter From the Inside

Hands down, my favorite season is winter, but instead of being outside enjoying the cold and snow, I'm inside enjoying the pain (that is getting better) of my foot that was operated on last Friday.

Since I don't have any recent "horsey" experiences to share with the readers, I guess I'll just share how my week has gone.

December 10th: Surgery day. For those who aren't quiet caught up about what was happening I'll share a quick summary. I have really high arches in my feet, which in turn I would keep spraining my ankles at least once a year. I saw a Doctor who put me in inserts that go into my shoes and for a few years that worked until I started spraining my ankles again. I saw another Doctors, because my last one moved to TEXAS, and she said that we should do surgery. Long story short, it has taken four tries on my right foot and on try on my left foot to get things right. I had three on my right foot then it seemed fine, but once we fixed the left foot I had a noticeably limp that would effect my right hip, so it was back to the right foot (which was this surgery). The plan was to, like my left foot, break a bone, take a small piece out and put a screw in. So I went to Scarborough for my surgery. Let me tell you that hospital is NICE! I have been there once before for another surgery and come to find out I had the same nurse that I had two years ago. She was a riot and made the visit, if possible, more enjoyable. So I went into surgery and came back. I guess there was a complication in the surgery, don't worry all my phalanges are still attached. When putting a screw into a bone, there is a wire that goes in with the screw to help guide the screw, and after the screw is in the wire should easily be pulled out. Well according to Dr K., the wire broke. She tried getting the wire out but decided it would cause more damage to dig for it than to leave it in.

Now in all of my past surgeries, when I am waking up I am tell people to stop talking to me and to let me sleep. Wasn't this time different! I am not sure what they gave me but it made me act way to funny. First off when I woke up, I decided that I wanted to get home as fast as I could, no sleeping for hours then going  home. If anyone has been under anethesia, you know how hard it is to stay awake after a four hour operation. So, in order to keep myself awake I was counting the ceiling tiles in my room, there was 28. My Mom was looking at me so weird once I started staring at the computer monitors and such and says "Stasha...what are you doing?" in reply I said and smiled "If I can identify things they will let me go home!" I guess my mom bursted out laughing. Next a nurse came in and asked me if I wanted toast and something to drink, I said yes please and got toast with jam and some apple juice. I was STARVING! I am the kind of person that needs breakfast in order to function. Mom said I ate each half a piece of toast in two bites. As I was drinking my apple juice I could see across the hall a nurse getting some coffee. I asked my Mom if I could have some coffee, it would help me wake up faster of course. My mom said no. I looked at her and said "He can have coffee! Why can't I have coffee?" Again I have no idea what kind of drugs they gave me! Again, another laughing session from my Mom and Grandmother. Needless to say I ended up being able to go home in record time! Must have been all that counting :)

December 12th: We had a family Chirstmas party that I actually slept though most of it =D

Now: This week has been pretty low key. I miss the horses a ton but I know the more I rest up the sooner I will recover and be able to ride again.

Update of K. as mentioned before in the post K. Accident a girl my mom worked with got in an accident that is preventing her from working, thus she cannot pay for groceries and to support her family. My mom and I have been going nuts asking people for food donations and such. I guess my mom got home last night and my super good friend, who I call "Pops", and his family dropped off at least 10 grocery bags full of food!!!! My mom called him up and said there is much more to come. I wanted to cry I was so happy! This man is so selfless and his family is amazing! As far as K goes, she is getting better and according to my mom can speak full sentences but she stutters a lot, but is still unable to work. I want to say a huge THANK YOU to Pops he went above and beyond what we could have imagined!! What a great man!

What to really read some "horsey" stuff? Go check out these blogs!

Now THATS a Trot  My friend Erin's blog (an Eventer with two amazing horses!)

A Collection of Madcap and Escapades A friend of Erin's, her name is Dom. She does amazing photography and owns a horse name Ozzie, also another Endurance (edited, I first said Eventer, sorry Dom!). 

I read those two blogs and get jealous every time! They are amazing writers and have some amazing stories to tell.

Last but not least a blog I have been recently following:

Green 'n Green = Black 'n Blue This is a blog about a woman and her OTTB mare who was on the brink of being put down but had a miracle recovery. Talk about being thankful!

Thanks for reading!

December 9, 2010

Not horse related but just, if not more important.

This post today is not dedicated to me, or even about horses. Tonight I want to tell you about a lady that my mom works with, I will refer to her as K. who is a remarkable woman who has had her world shattered in order to to save another's life.

I am not aware of all the details but my mom has been telling me parts of K's battle.

K. works in a doctors complex and my mom has, as a PA, had the honor of working with K. and I have heard many great stories about this woman who I have yet to meet.

Sometime last week, my mom came home in an off mood and as I usually do I asked her how her day was and she started with her story.

She told me about a car accident that K. had the previous day. As K. was driving home from work, she saw that a truck with a man and a dog in it, was sliding on the slippery Maine roads, and could not seem to avoid K.'s lane. In an effort to avoid a head on collision that would certainly end in injuries to all parties, K. swerved off the road and into a ditch. After the ditch, K's car hit a tree, but this is not the worse part of the event. K's airbags did not deploy after hitting the tree. This car is not used and K has been the only owner of this car. Due to the air bag's not deploying K suffered a major concussion that sent her to the hospital. At first the doctors sent her home with the diagnosis of a concussion and told her to take it easy for a while.

A while after this, K. began to realize that she couldn't finish sentences, and she couldn't find the words to every day objects. Going back to the doctor's, K found the concussion was worse than predicted. The doctors say she is going to have to be off of work for a while in order for the inflammation in her brain to subside, and they are hopping after some time her speech will come back.

Not only is K. out of a job, but she also has two kids. A 13 year old daughter and a 15 year old son, three dogs, and a devoted husband. The husband works, but it is not nearly enough to support all of their children and all the necessities.

K and her family are finding that they do not have enough money to buy food and they are unable to pay for their insurance for K. My mom saw K today and as she described their discussion, I was brought into tears about how this woman is telling people "I'm not stupid, I just can't think of the word".

We are doing as much as we can to help this family!

So far we have a plan of asking our big grocery stores to donate food for the family and dogs and asking some oil companies for a discount or free oil for their house that they are renting to own.

Ideally I would LOVE to get people to donate what they can for this family, but another thing I would love even more is some ideas of what we can do to for this family!
So far we are going to be talking to
Hannaford, Walmart, Dominos (maybe they can make and deliver a pizza for the family for dinner a night), some local oil companies, and the hospital that K worked for.

If anyone has more ideas please post a comment here or send me an e mail to

Even letters ask for her to get better would be greatly appreciated so I could deliver them to her.

Thank you for reading.

December 8, 2010

Stressed, and two days to go.

I got to ride only one time this week. I wanted to be able to ride at least twice, once on Monday and once today, but today didn't happen with my psychology paper(s) going on.

So far I have managed to complete my 15 page psychology final, 2 page biology paper, and take all my finals. The only thing left to do is to type my conclusion on my psychology term paper and I will be done. Thank goodness because I can feel the stress getting to me.

As I mentioned, I rode on Monday. I got to ride Ranger which was great because I know I won't be seeing him for at least a week or so.

I got to the barn just after five. Want to know how determined I was to ride? It snowed and was super slippery on the roads on Monday, our first snow fall yay!, but goign to the barn was a very slow process and I found myself sliding on the road twice, BUT I was determined to ride. I also had my papers at home waiting for me to finish them.

Needless to say my mom was not impressed that I went riding when my papers were not done, but what can I say, I need to ride.

So, where was I? Oh yes, I got to the barn and survived the ride there. I helped M. bring in the horses. We got all the horses in and I went to go get Ranger and I saw that he was an iceicle! M. reminded me that I needed to get all the ice/snow/excess water off of him before we could ride. How long did it take me to accomplish this? Close to an hour! To get him defrosted and tacked up.

M. had mentioned in my lesson that Saturday before that Ranger had been Mr. Speed Demond and actually caused a girl to fall off of him. I was sort of suprised to hear this, but I know how horses can be and even the most calm and gentle ones have their off days. M. told me to be extra careful and not to let him be Mr. Speedy.

Well needless to say, I got on him and he was a very good boy! We did some extra warming up and stretching espically since it was roughly 20 degrees out. After our warm up I worked on trotting and asking him to go from trot to walk without using much rein and we did very good! He would even hault from a walk without me using any rein at all.

There was a couple times where he would get into his speedy modes, but he would always slow down to a nice little trot when I whispered "slow".

And like the past few times that I have been riding, I made myself do some no stirrup work at the walk and trot. My balance was a little off at first but it did get better and after a while I went back to the stirrups and did some more trotting. At the end I took some time to really cool him off. He didn't need a cooler because I never work him hard enough to sweat, maybe thats why he likes me so much! xD

My surgery is in 2 days and last night I didn't sleep well at ALL. I think it is because of the surgery and my stress.

Mom's going to help me finish up this paper! Hopefully I'll finish this post later tonight :)

Thanks for reading!

December 1, 2010

Nose to the Grind

So my family has always told me that when I start college I am going to have my nose to the grind a LOT if I wanted to get into pharmacy school. Well now I want to go to vet school but I am sure it still applies. And let me tell you my nose has been to the grind for the past week and my head is starting to feel the strain.

My surgery countdown is 9 days away and right now it doesn't feel real. I think about it and thing "egh" what ever. I'm sure when the count down is 2 or 3 days away it will sink in.

I haven't been riding nearly as much as I want to this past week and I have to reschedule my lesson that I have this Saturday for an earlier date, which is good in a way!

Today my goal was to type and finish my 10 page final for psychology. Well it looks like I'm going to do the other option of doing 3 essays five pages each instead of 5 essays at 2 pages each, what is wrong with me?! But my psychology term paper is pretty much one of the questions for my final, so I figure I can just copy and paste a few sections from that and call it good, and I started working on question 2 and found that I could easily type five pages for that so I figured why not just do one more.

So if I can past that final in I will feel some stress relief. I talked to my Chemistry teacher and asked him if I could take the final Thursday (day before my surgery) while they review for the final, because if not I'm going to have to take it after my lab at 5 and I would really prefer not to be in school until 7PM. I thought he was a good deal but he didn't like the idea for some reason, so I'm hoping he is going to give me what he thinks the plan should be tomorrow.

I also found out that on top of my biology final I also have a biology LAB final! *head desk* I mean REALLY when am I going to have time to take THAT?

So since I was tired of typing my final for psychology I decided to blog! So productive huh?

So I failed epically at the 30 day challenge and I failed at meeting the 50K word challenge too, oh well I gave it a super good shot! Maybe next year when my life is more interesting ^.^

On a horsey business side! I got TWO replies from possible worker student positions. YAY!
One person from NH told me that they do not have any housing available, so I am considering to count that one out, but I asked her if there was any way to arrange housing near by, I doubt it but worth a shot.

The second reply was from a farm in Mass. asking for me to contact them in May because it is too early for them to commit to a summer working student at this point in time.

None of these replies were "yes" but I was still ecstatic either way and that I actually got replies.

Back to typing my final I guess.

Thanks for reading!